Another Evening with the Irishman

Had a third date with the Irishman. We went to a nice place for dinner. I picked. In fact I've picked all of our date locations. He's new to the States and I also think he's trying to be a gentleman.

And yes, he is a gentleman. He always pays, always opens the door. He has nice manners. Sometimes his real Irish comes out in spurts about stupid things we do in America like over salt our fries and a bitch about a pen not working. Yeah, there's really nothing to complain about him.

But...

By the third date you should know right? You should know if this person is something special, worthwhile. I feel nothing. Nothing. Ambivalent. Eh.

Also, something occurred in which we finally acknowledged our ages. He is in fact 25 and he knows very well that I am 28. 3 years, not a big deal, but this affirmation led to a conversation in which he said that before now he was just floating through life without a clear direction. Then he asked me...

Does 30 scare you?

Yes, because I'm almost 30 and still have not had a serious relationship.

I didn't tell him that. But it was clear that we're in different stages in our lives and I don't want to watch someone go through their 20s. I'm almost done with this stupid transitional decade. I want out of my 20s so bad. It's painful watching my brother go through his quarter-life crisis.

UGH.

But back to the real crisis at hand. You should know by the third date, right? I just don't feel any spark. Any deeper connection. And it doesn't help that Irishman isn't making any moves on me at all. (He's a gentleman remember?). If he made a move I think I would know for sure. As it stands I just feel this awkwardness that I don't know what his expectations are.

So, I guess that means he wants me to decide. Why do I always have to decide for him?

Okay Dating LA - why do you keep accepting dates with him? Can't think of a good reason no to. Boredom. Something to do.

I'm an awful person.